Become to Be

Morning- Went out about 10. Was pretty chilly today. But feels nice considering that it's 100+ F. in the summer..... Ewww just makes me feel sick......... But great run! I wanna start focusing on the title, and target that I want, and need! I am really really wanting a running scholarship! I wanna work for it! And I know that I am going to have to improve a lot more in order to get one! So now that's one of my new motivations! :)

Morning- Went out with Abel, Krenshaw, Mike, and David! Felt pretty nice, and smooth! I like running with these guys! They make it fun! We see coach and wanting to talk to him.... So we run to the school, since he is doing teacher stuff... So we stop by and talk a little, and then!!!! We get Paul, and he joined our little gang! And that's when it started to get really crazy! Like almost crazier than me! So a lot.... But anyways.... We ran back the pond park. Felt great, but I just wish our team could be there for some moments that are super funny! :)

Afternoon- 4 miles with the team. Feels nice to be back in school, but really long day in school. I felt pretty great during the run actually. I felt amazing! It was great! But next week the real work starts! So that is could! I am playing a basketball game, and I totally mauled this kid, but I got hit in the process... But I got hit in the calve, and now it just kills.... I hope it doesn't hurt tomorrow... Did some core, and lifting today. Felt good to actually lift, and work hard!

Afternoon- Vertical test today! I jumped 20 inches... Which is pretty bad... But I am super tight, and sore right now... Run today was something different. I am just going to think of it as summer training. Like the same format... But I am going to work at it everyday! Give it my best! And all! That's all I ask of myself now... No more, "I wasn't going all out, I didn't dig deep enough, I wasn't going hard enough, I was only going 95%...." NO MORE!!!!!!! I AM SICK OF ALL OF IT!!!!!!!! NO MORE!!!!!!! TIME TO CHANGE NOW! I am going to just tell myself to suck it up! Really?!?! Can I give more?!? Answer is always yes I Just have to find it! Just thinking last night the way my calve was hurting... If it would hurt like that tomorrow.... Reminded me soo much of my Achilles tendon being all jacked up... And thought to myself... Did I not learn the lesson the first time?!? Or do I need another one?!? And I thought, and thought.... Nothing came to mind... Until finally after hours, and hours of thinking.... It's how much I love running, how much I love having the wind blow in my face, how much pain I can cause myself beyond human! It's how much work I put in! So called, "Going the extra mile!" It's the people that honk at me, or give me the T-Bird! I love it all! I don't care what people say! Why do you run?!?! Well guess what!!! I run because I love IT!!!!!!!! More than you! More than anything else in the world! I am never going to quit, because of some injury, or because of what people say... It's stupid what people say these days..... I am just going to say it straight forward right now! When I started running I hated it! Like more than cats! It sucked.... But guess what?!? I pulled through, and guess what it did to me, and my speed?!?! I went through the roof, the sky, and beyond space!!! I NEVER thought I could become this fast, or become this kind of person! I kept going at it, year after year! Even though I have run 3 years... It's really time to change! I just realized something... Just thinking out loud.... That I can only worry about myself... I can only control what I do. I just have to ask myself the serious question: Did I give it my best? Do I truly know what that means? Or am I thinking I am?!? I honestly don't know... But I can tell who ever is out there.... That I will become one of the fastest runners in high school! And I AM going to SET HIGH GOALS! That push me beyond what is required... I don't care if it's setting a world record, or even coming in last place at some random race! I don't care! If I gave it my all, and pushed through, and did my best! I can move on! Man, this is like a race entire.... Guess it's time to wrap it up with a bow on top. What it comes down to is, "Who is willing to work harder, and have the most guts!?!"

Morning- Went running with Krenshaw, Abel, Mike, Cam B., Jake B., Byron, and BIG D (David), and I! Went towards green springs from 2450 park. Felt pretty good. Was pretty chilly at the start of the run. But warmed up a little after going to a while. Went to Megan's house with the boys. Pretty fun. 

Afternoon- 3 mile warm up, and cool down total mileage. And 2 mile work out. 2X1000's With 3 minute recover. Was supposed to hit 3:40ish. And first one was 3:12 oops! And then next one was 3:44. So pretty much the time I was supposed to hit. I have to say that it was pretty easy... But the intensity will increase, and will get faster as we go on!!! Not super tough, but pretty good work out! I love work outs! This one felt really great! Pretty much the entire time Abel, Jason, and I were all within the same 3 feet of each other. And Paul right behind! I hope it stays like that the entire season! That would be LEGIATE!

Afternoon- Went out on Mustang trail! And I saw nooo Mustangs driving.... What the heck?!?! But I am starting to actually like trail running each time I do it more! Like actually run on them. Works the form really well. Felt pretty well, and I have learned to just focus, and get in the zone when I run most of the time to help with whatever I need help with. And as of now! I am going to GROW MY HAIR OUT!!! Until state! So it reminds me of what I want!!! And when the time comes for a short time when I race at state I shall have a sick mo-hock, or a beast mullet! :) So whatever one I get will help me race! Because I am going to say," Flame on!" And just take off! :)

Afternoon- 6 miler tempo thing. All I can say that I great lesson was learned today as I got done running! I just need to run the right speed, work out or whatever I need to do! I really felt great! I can tell that my mental toughness is back! Cause I didn't even dare to slow down! But I need to control myself from now on! Smart MATT!

Afternoon- Nice and good 4 miler! Just windy... But nevertheless it shall be worse tomorrow by the weather right now!!! It's time to learn more about running! My calve is kinda bugging me... But I will ice, and stretch it out. Did some nice old striders! And did weights after! Mike Finch!!! Man, he is some tough kid! 11 pull ups! Beast!!! Considering he weighs 190, and is 6"5! He is HUGE MAN! Just kidding! He's smaller than that, but still beast! We did a pull up challenge, and I got 5! Yeah that's right 5!!!! Well today we were supposed to do some interval stuff... But too windy, and by the looks of it.... Not soo good weather tomorrow! Oh and basketball game fore 10 minutes that I showed up for! 0 POINTS AGAIN!!! OH YEAH!!! Miss all my free-throws! But I still got like 5 steals, with a great foul of my favorites! I call it the sucide! I clash bodies with someone going in for a lay-up!!! It's soo beast!

Afternoon- Ran the Koesion test thingy. And I ran a 400 flat the first one. Which was great! But the second one was just hidous.... I just didn't speed up like I was supposed too.... I took off way to slow.... And even if I would have been closer to abel, I should have gotten 400 meters that last lap too! GRRR! I ran 765 meters, which is equal to a 2:06 800..... Blah............. Not even close to what I want, but hey that's a pretty good time for this time of the season! Next time I get a chance to run something related to the 800, or it really all out. I shall give it my all!!! :) I am going to come back with VENGANCE! I promised Abel he that will be his only time to do that! :) Too actually beat me!

Morning- Went out with Mike, Abel, Krenshaw, Byron, and David! So nice group! And guess who we saw on our run!?!? James!!! Mike was freaking out! Guys it's JAMES!!! It's James! Ok Mike! But then we started to follow him, and we started to catch up, and he stretched for a second. And then we ran with him for about 1.5 miles. Which was pretty cool! Then we flipped it, and started our tempo. I was with Abel, and Byron for the first 5 minutes, and then I fell off a little... And the gap just grew bigger, and bigger... Then with about 4 minutes left... I told myself not again! Come on Matt YOUR better than this thinking in my head! So I start gaining ground on them where I should be, and boom.... I made the wrong turn.... And was thinking I was going the right way.... So I ran for about 200 meters... And realized that I went the wrong way, and by the time I was on the right road again... The tempo was over.... But it was good! I learned a few things on this run today! Mike really likes to run with James, and that if I actually visualize things in my head, and talk to myself into it, then I can do anything! And I do better at whatever I was doing, such as work outs, racing, tempos etc. But it's like I have to argue with myself mentally! That's what I did at region! I would argue with myself! And I think of it as a big dude... Like someone that's telling me to slow down, or it hurts too much (something like that!). And I think to myself that I can make it hurt more! So I knocked him down, and he gets back up, and each time it gets harder to knock "The Dude" down! Man, thinking about it gives my the chills! :) But going up the back stretch up at Region I wanted to die.... But "The Dude" was like might as well stop now! And I was like no!!!!!!! So I knock him down, and he gets right back up, and I knock him down again!!!! Just wanting him to stay down! And over time I am just pounding "The Dude" in the ground, and just yelling at him, "STAY DOWN!" And finally! I get sick of it! And I give him one great knock down, and he doesn't come back! Cause I finished the race knowing I gave it my all!!!! WHOA!!!!! Huge story! That's going on the front cover of the newspaper! But for reals... That's what I realized today. If I do that I can do ANYTHING!!!! DUN DUN DUN!!!! So next time I struggle all I gotta do is talk myself into it!!! I think I am almost golden! All I need now is a little more confidence in myself! And I will be "UNSTOPABLE!" I mean "Un-Merge-Able!" Haha! Oh and we headed back to where we started, and Byron had to use the bathroom so we had to extend a little..... And I got lost so.... Yeah..... Great run for today! Practice is going to get more intense by the week! >:D

Afternoon- 1.5 mile warm up. And 1.5 mile cool down. 3x1000's on the track! I am starting to like this stuff already! Just knowing whats coming up! I learned a great lesson today! That I just need to set a GOAL in work outs, and races! Work to come to that GOAL. If it's controlling the pace, or just killing it. Or hitting a certain time. That's my new GOAL! Just do what I am supposed to do! If I have to push to get my goal then let it be! If I have to puke after a work out, or race let it be! If I have to slow down, and relax let it be!  But times were 3:34, 3:29, and 3:19! So I kept dropping, except I was supposed to hit 3:22's..... So the only one I hit right was the last one.... But nevertheless! Might as well correct it now, and get it right next time! Goal for next week: Hit the right times on this work out. And work on controlling my pace! Lifted today! I feel soo STRONG!!!! And BUFF! I talk soo much crap! It's funny, when I think about it! Cause I really talk a lot of it! Well great day today! I felt rather excited for the work out today! I was cheering that we were going 1000's!!! HAHA! I never do that! Something has changed in my life that makes me VERY HAPPY! I love it! :)

Afternoon- 5 miles on the fossil trail. Not too bad, but I started to feel a little off at the end...

Afternoon- 8 miles with 18 minute tempo at 5:40 pace. Goal not accomplished..... Nothing more to say....

Afternoon- 5.75 miles. With 4x400's at old man hills. I felt alright, considering I wanted to die... I just had stomach problems... I kept up with Abel pretty well. Good day. Had lifting I felt soo tough!

Afternoon- Recovery day. 4 miles with striders. Pretty easy run! I felt pretty good. I need a new drive for running right now... Like track... Because XC I had a drive to be on varsity and hold that spot, but now.... Idk.....

Morning- Went out by dirt mile. 2 mile warm up. I really sucked on my run today.... It felt like the harder I pushed the worsed I felt... Like I couldn't breath... I think I might be getting a little cold... But the first one was 6 minutes....... Not even close to my pace... But the second one was closer at 5:35. And about 3/5 of the other lap was pretty hard. But I think I am getting sick.....

No run do to illness.... Have a terrible cough, and runny nose... It's hard to breath going up the stairs.... Hopefully I get better fast!

No run again.... >:( I am getting very angry about getting sick! I have been watching some running videos about motivation, inspiration, and who is the most hungry for your goals!!! And now.... I don't care, if I am sick, or if I puke! I am going to run tomorrow! No more excuses! Besides it's been 3 days.... That's long enough! So tomorrow I start! Runny nose is gone, except cough has gotten worse..........

Morning- Went with the team. Thought running would make me feel better.... Nope it didn't at all! In fact I was coughing worse! HAHA! :)

But atleast I got something in today.... 

Afternoon- 6 miles with striders. And weights! I honestly felt terrible.... But it's my first day back in 4 days.... It felt like 3 weeks.... But I pushed through, and I felt crazy today! "who" was my word of the day! But weights felt pretty good! Striders, and weights felt great! But the run felt eww..... But we had 1x2:00 minute, and 2x1:00 minutes. Those were rather interesting.... But glad I am back! And I am getting my XC thinking back!

Morning- 3 miles. Felt pretty good from yesterday. So improvement is taking place! And it wasn't even that cold at all....

Afternoon- We went out to some trail! And the first half of the run I just wanted to die.... But I just kept pushing through the sluggishness... I felt pretty bad.... But once we got to the top, which was an amazing sight! I was breathing really hard, and then like 2 minutes later normal breathing.... Weird I know? I need to work on my breathing... And I couldn't even breath on the way up... But on the way back, I felt amazing! I got this HUGE aderline rush, which felt amazing! And I was positive! I had some kind of race in my head so I kept speeding up to the front of the group! Really not needed right then, but still! I have not had the chance to run in 4 days! So I might as well get back fast! I will hopefully recovery ALL the way over the weekend, which I am thinking! And I will be ready to run some tough work outs! :) Great run!

Morning- Went out about 10 with some of the boys. It was really nice the first part of the run. We had 20 minute tempo. David kept up with me all the way. He did really well, except I didn't run even close to my time... I was aiming for 5:25-5:30. And the first mile I threw down a 5:55. And I then slowed a little bit to a 6:05. And the last mile was about 5:54ish.... And last .25 was 1:30. So alright work out. I just am not going to stress out about it, and just be ready to roll Monday! David ran really well.

No runs again due to illness, but this time was really strange... About 2 in the morning. My body tempature basically went into shock, and I would get really hot, and really cold, up and down for about 2 hours. And I have never felt this kind of fatigue before. I have never felt worse in my life.... It was actually the worst I have felt... 

No run today. Do to illness.... Went to the Doc's, and I found out that I have a "Sinus Infection" or that's what it turned into. First it started out as a cold, cough, and now this...... Doc says," I will not be able to run for a while." At the earliest that's, if I even get well to that point. I can run on Friday (Maybe).... Taking Anti-botics. So that should help me get better faster! There is soo much pressure in my head. It feels like a balloon just waiting to be popped..... 

Feeling pretty good, but still have symtoms.... Just need to get over this! And I am! No run again....... :( But I am coming back!

No run.... But I am coming back tomorrow, and I will be able to run!!!! :D 

I wake up this morning feeling Z-E-S-T-Y!!!!!!  Just amazing, but not all the symtom free! I will be tomorrow!!!! I am going to come back strong, and confident! I feel great about confidence inside myself right now!!!! The energy is back of "Red Leader" (DUN DUN DUN)!!!!!!! Hope you guys enjoyed it being quiet, because tomorrow, I am going to go     C-R-A-Z-Y!!!! (CRAZY)